The Answers

Okay, I know you guys are dying of curiousity... Mildly curious? Um how about willing to read the answers?

* I learned how to speak Siobani, the elven language in Lord of the Rings. True. It took me about 6 months, but I joined a forum, took classes and could understand the Siobani spoken in the movies. Oddly enough, Aragorn, Viggo Mortenson, pronounces it better than any of the elves in the movie. Somewhere I have a poem that I wrote in Siobani that is actually quite good. (IMO)

• I have trapped and eaten beaver. True. Well, not quite true. You only eat the tail. We made dog food out of the rest. I lived in a small town in Washington for many years. My mother was friends with a trapper who took me under his wing. He took me trapping, made me moccasins (I miss those—you’ll never find them in the stores. Authentic, sewn-to-the-dimension-of-your-feet moccasins.) And attempted to teach me the old ways while he taught me all of the above. He was only about an eighth Indian, but he was married to a full blood... I don’t remember her tribe. So what does beaver taste like? I hear you snickering… really it tastes like ox. Never had ox? Very rich beef.

• I’ve driven the wrong way on a one way street. True. I am not proud of this one. I was 16 and dating an older guy. I was… er inebriated at a party and someone asked who wanted to go pick up the pizza. I said I did and he tossed me the keys. Did I mention I didn’t have a license yet, and that I was 16 and too drunk to walk straight? I did end up driving the wrong way on a one way street but it was after 1am and there was no traffic. God watches out for fools.

• I’ve went skydiving on my 30th birthday. False. I am so afraid of heights I can’t ride in a glass elevator without feeling queasy. I get severe vertigo and I just know I’m going to faint and fall…. No, I don’t need counseling, I’m just going to stay away from heights. If God had meant me to fly, I’d have wings…

• To celebrate my 32nd birthday, I pierced my bellybutton. True. It was also kind of an act of independence because I was free from an emotionally abusive relationship but that sounded so depressing. Yes, it’s still pierced. I kept it in for as long as I could when I was pregnant with my youngest and then borrowed a tongue stud to run in through when I got too big. The skin was so thin, it was scary. The moment I got home from the hospital, I stuck it back in and it’s still there. Well, it’s another one now. I have quite a few.

• I’ve been in every state west of the Mississippi. True. I was born in Utah, moved to California when I was two and when I was 8, my mom decided to go on an evangelistic trip with some of her friends. So she piled my two sisters and me into an RV with a family of 6 and we traveled all over the U.S. I saw the Mississippi, but we never crossed it. I remember someone waking me up to tell me we were in Texas but I never saw it until I went back 20 or so years later. We stayed in Nebraska for about 2 weeks. I remember the snapdragons. We lived at a farm commune in Minnesota for 3 months. They have the biggest mosquitoes in the world—but I also remember really good ice cream in St. Paul. We were going to stay in Montana for awhile but didn’t. I don’t remember why. Then it was on to Washington State where I lived for 3 years.

• My spirit animal, the bobcat, appeared to me when I was 12. True. As you probably imagine, this has something to do with the Trapper mentioned above. His wife was pregnant and overdo but every time they traveled the road, the baby would turn. (It was a really bad road) As the baby was head down and she was so close to delivery, they didn’t want her traveling the road again. So I went to stay with her. She had a 3 yo and a 1 yo. If she went into labor, I was supposed to run for town and get help. (Over two miles through dense forest) This was the kind of woods where you waited for deer to get out of the way so you could pass. There was no running water, no electricity. This was as close to ‘nature’ as you could get it.
About the second week, I woke up to two golden eyes staring at me from the door of the trailer. (I was alone, they were in the other trailer) The eyes weren’t very high or large and I remember wondering if I was dreaming. I told the trapper about it and he said there were bobcat tracks around the trailer. To make a long story short: He told me the bobcat had chosen me. I still have a handmade earring with a bobcat claw he gave me as a reminder.