Completely random post about breasts.


I have never had big breasts. Well, except for about 2 months after the birth of my first daughter, but that’s another story completely.

My breasts aren’t small. They’re, well, average...I guess. My sisters all got the big boobs in the family. But that's okay, I got the brains. *heehee, it's okay, they don't read this blog*

Okay, my point? I don’t have that jaw-dropping, male drool-inducing cleavage that is often the desire of men and women alike and has made plastic surgeons a fortune.

Yesterday, thanks to a good bra and a tight tank top, voila! Cleavage. Still not the jaw-dropping, male drool-inducing variety, but hey you work with what you've got. Now you have to understand, I'm rather... conservative.(Says the erotic romance writer.) I usually don't do low cut shirts. Usually. But I was working the cleavage.

That night I sat down with my kids to watch a movie and I kept dropping popcorn down my top and having to fish it out. Which was kind of embarrassing but also made me think. I don't usually drop that much popcorn. I mean I can be clumsy, but I'm pretty proficient at getting food to my mouth.

So what was different? Well, I normally don't have a reservoir in which to catch my errant food, that's one. And then I remembered the last time I'd worn the good bra tight shirt combo, a lady bug flew down my shirt -- Yeah, try to get a ladybug out of your cleavage -- something that has never happened to me on un-cleavage days.

So, I've come to a conclusion. Through some trick of science, cleavage has gravity.

Think about it. Where do men’s gazes eventually settle? Drawn in like a magnet... or gravity?

Where is one of the first places male hands roam?

Why else would stray insects and exploded corn find it’s way down my top?

Say what you like, I think cleavage has it's own gravitational pull.

11 comments:

Cecile said...

You crack me up!!

Okay confession time, I am a boob girl. I love woman with any shape, size cleavage. Especially when you work with what you have.
A friend once told me that was false advertising if you wore a push up bra.... and I told her it is the wrapping that makes unwrapping so much fun!!!! I love push up bras!

But you are right... cleavage is its own world! Men and women alike adore cleavage!
Okay... going on that note, lol!!
Have a great day honey!!

Lynne Roberts said...

Thanks, Cecile. : )

It's only false advertising if you're selling something and I'm not for sale. ; )

I love push up bras too, but I've also been known to go without, one of the benefits of having less cleavage.

Cecile said...

You are most welcome...
Yeah... that is what I say too! I am not for sale... but you know for the right "price," lmbo!!!

I wish I could go without a bra.. just for the sake of it... but then my boobs would probably touch my knees.. The gravity thing... LMBO... true story!

Lynne Roberts said...

You know, that's what I tell my teen daughter when she complains that her boobs aren't big enough. I remind her of gravity and that what sticks out, must droop down. ; )

LOL Yeah, she only gives me a dirty look, doesn't buy it at all.

Helen Hardt said...

Great post, Lynne! I was blessed with DDs, and I have dropped many a kernel of popcorn down there! Once in a bar, I was stirring my Bloody Mary, and (I kid you not) an ice cube popped out of my glass and landed between the girls. Yep...gravity!

Lynne Roberts said...

LOL, Helen. That happened to a character in a book I edited not too long ago.

My sisters (all three of them) are blessed with at least DD. *Shakes head* I really did get the short end of the stick.

Thanks for stopping by! : )

Jinxie said...

HA! Okay, I so agree with this gravitational pull thing (btw, my sisters all got the big boobs too. Bitches!).

I've recently learned that a racerback bra that clips in the front makes 'em look *really* good! Especially in a tank top. =D

Lynne Roberts said...

LOL I am so a Victoria Secret kind of girl. ; ) ...I could tell the story about how I padded my bra so much I popped out the top.... The thought still has me turning a delightful shade of pink.

Jinxie said...

LOL That's hilarious.

Um, I need to pay more attention to your Monday posts, it seems. hubba hubba

Cecile said...

Oh Lynne, that is funny!!!
Hell at the age of what.... 6... I put softballs in my Wonder Woman bathing suit, lmbo!!!
Yeah...

And I am sooooooooo a Victoria Secret Girl!!!

Wookies Girl said...

Lynne, From my own experience, I completely agree. Boobs do have gravity, and when I am sitting out back with my usual tank top on, I am attacked by gnats. They love my cleavage.. and NO its not fun one went gets down below he cleavage and I have to first locate it.. then kill it. LOL